The age old question that seems to have so much importance in the office, or when entertaining - which goes in first when you’re making a cup of tea? What do you think? There are so many ways of explaining and describing how you make your most perfect cuppa and I am not even sure if there really is a definitive answer that is proven to be the best.
I have to ask, however. Does it really make that much difference?
Now all of the tea making fraternity and aficionados may well be going in to a complete meltdown, but to be completely honest it probably makes very little difference to the end product and even the most discernible palette would probably struggle to tell the difference between the outcome of either method.
So what then is the point in asking I hear you cry?
Simply because this highlights a problem that can so easily creep into every day life leading to any (or indeed every) action, task or job becoming heavy, laborious and another little thing that makes the day feel as though it is out of control.
What really matters?
In the grand scheme of things, a good, or even a bad, cup of tea can make little or no difference to our day or it can become the most unbelievable pinnacle of a debilitating meltdown. Surely these two opposites can not be caused by just a cup of tea?
Well, no of course not!
However, the way in which we perceive, think about or view things can have the most profound effect on the way in which we can live our days, weeks, months or even years.
Mindset can make or break every situation and the smallest or most banal thing can become the catalyst for a day of great disappointment, or (if you allow it) something that can bring a feeling of joy and gratitude. Our mindset is something that we can develop and learn to work with*.
Often it is natural to assume the worst of any situation or other people and indeed it can be a way of avoiding disappointment or give a feeling of surprise or a lift when things turn out far better than expected. But surely this is not the most satisfying way to live. Believing that the worst will happen will also generally put the worst option at the front of the queue. If you believe that bad things will happen they generally happen as your behaviour will be inline with your way of thinking or belief.
On the other hand, if you expectation is that things will turn out well and that a situation will be all you want and more it is much more likely to turn out as you anticipated. Of course, there will be times when you may get disappointed or let down but surely this must be better than feeling downbeat about things?
Think about it: A Bad or Good thing...
Most things happen for a reason. Getting a new job may be as much a cause for a celebration as not getting a job which is just not right for you. Getting a pay rise may seem like a great thing, but then not having additional responsibilities, increased paperwork and great expectations from employers may also be equally as good.
Try to think about a few situations that you have been in lately that caused you to react in a particular way. What could you have changed about your thinking that may have been more useful? How could you allow yourself to see the positive benefits from something that initially looks as though it may have all gone wrong?
This change in thinking can lead to many more positive experiences and a way of developing a range of new opportunities.
Remember, don’t sweat the small stuff.
Have a bad cup of tea and enjoy it - especially if someone else has taken the time and effort to make it for you.
If you want some immediate help, please check out my hypnotherapy tracks for relaxation and developing mindset. All tracks are free of charge - do contact me if you would like anything more specific and I can create, record and send you your own personalised hypnotherapy session.
*Of course if you are suffering with a clinical mental health issue this is something you will need to develop inline with your doctor and/or counsellor. Although this article will provide useful comments or insights it is not intended to be used as a substitute for personalised, medical support by a trained practitioner.